Stuff You Can Rent
- Written by Candice Elliott
If you only need an expensive item once, you can rent it rather than buy it. You’ll be amazed at the number of things you can rent. Sex dolls included.
You know you can rent a car or a house but there are lots of other things you can rent too. If you only need an item once, or just every few months or years, why buy it? If you do buy it, you also have to maintain and store it, costing more money.
So save money, time and space and let’s see what we can rent.
Clothes And Accessories
Wedding Dresses The average bride spends $1,300 on a wedding dress. A dress that she’ll wear for several hours at most and can’t wear anywhere else. So unless you are Miss Havisham, buying a wedding dress is not very economical. You can also rent a dress by a designer that you could never afford to buy.
Formal Wear You can rent clothes for any formal occasion, a wedding, prom, evening gowns, men’s formal wear. Many sites and stores have accessories you can rent too, small clutch bags, jewelry, even shoes.
Sports Clothes If you want to ski, snow board or go diving, you can rent the boots, snow pants, and dive suit. This also makes it easier and cheaper to fly, you can’t fit all that stuff into a carry on so the airline will charge you to check a bag.
Purses I tried to come up with a reason to do this and all I could think of is a high school reunion. Maybe you want to show off how well you’ve done but are too sensible to buy a bag that costs a couple of months’ salary. Or maybe you aren’t doing well but want to pretend to all the jerks who bullied you in high school that you are. Well, you can rent a bag to give that impression!
Tools Most of us probably live near a Home Depot. There is even one in Manhattan. They rent tons of stuff you need around the house. Everything from lawn and garden equipment to plumbing equipment.
Party Supplies If you want to have a really big party you don’t have to buy extras of stuff like glasses and chairs. You can rent them and things like linens, coat racks (if you’re too fancy to have everyone throw their coats on your bed), tents, even cotton candy machines!
Renting party supplies is an especially good idea if you want to have a themed party. That could be anything from the latest Disney stuff for a child’s party to casino games for a Monte Carlo themed party.
Cleaning Equipment If you need to do a big spring clean you can rent stuff that you don’t need often like carpet cleaners, duct cleaning equipment and power washers. A little DIY never killed anyone.
Hobbies You’ve decided you want to get back to nature, leave the big city for a little R&R in the fresh mountain air. So you plan a camping trip. Sleeping under the stars, cooking on an open fire. Well, you need stuff to do that. Expensive stuff. Which is fine if you decide that you love camping.
But what if you get attacked by a bear?! I live in NYC, I’ve heard stories about mad bears roaming around the forest. If you get attacked by a bear, which seems likely, you will probably not be so keen on camping. Good thing you rented tents, sleeping bags, and cooking stuff instead of buying them.
Renting the kit is a good idea for any hobby you suddenly get a wild hair for. Cycling, skiing, diving. The gear is expensive, try it before you invest so you don’t have to either store or try to sell all that stuff.
There is some crazy stuff that you can rent, stuff I’m not sure is a good idea to rent but a few were so weird, and maybe so are you, I’ve included them.
Caskets No, really. Maybe you never really cared for the dearly departed and plan on dragging them to the curb in a garbage bag. But you have to have a funeral first and people might think you’re a bad person if the recently deceased is popping out of a Hefty bag during the wake. Appearances are important. That’s why you chose a red dress for the occasion.
So you can rent a casket for the funeral. The rental has a removable liner, the body is placed into a cheap wooden casket and that is placed into the fancy rental.
Even if you did love the recently departed, caskets are expensive. The average casket costs between $2,500-$4,500. I see no point in spending that kind of money on something that is either going to be burned up or buried in the ground no matter how you felt about the person inside.
Fans This one is so stupid I can’t even believe it’s real. But it is! You can hire people to follow you around snapping your photo like paparazzi and asking for your autograph. The only reason I could think to use this would be to annoy someone you don’t like. But annoying people you don’t like is pretty fun so maybe this is a great idea.
A Wingman Are you a socially retarded weirdo who can’t talk to the opposite sex without getting slapped with a restraining order? You can hire someone to accompany you when you leave your mom’s basement and venture into the wild so that you stop getting drinks thrown in your face. I think you would be better off renting a puppy and taking it to a park.
An Evil Clown If you do this, you are FUBAR. Seriously, there is no hope for you and you should surrender whatever kids you already have to the nearest fire station and then have yourself sterilized so you can’t have more.
If you aren’t dissuaded, you can rent an evil clown to follow your kid around and scar them mentally. He only works in Switzerland though which is good for you because while you’re there ironing out the details, you can check yourself into, but not out of, the Dignitas clinic.
Sex Dolls Eeewwww! Who would do this? Is this what happens to the kids of parents who rented an evil clown to follow them? That is the only explanation I can think of. The guy that turned a corpse into a sex doll may have been less weird than this, at least he wasn’t sharing. But if you are too good for a Fleshlight, the terms of your parole bar you from talking to a real girl, and too poor for your own sex doll, it’s nice to know you have options.
So before you make a big outlay of cash for something that you won’t need often or just want to test out, see if you can try it before you buy it.